If you’re an LGBT service member on Active Duty (and 18 or older), please consider participating in this study. You could even receive a $25 Amazon Gift Card (if you participate off-duty). Please check out the link (http://cir.usc.edu/MAPstudy) and contact me with any questions.
It’s not that I dress up to go to the gym–I’m really only there to work out. But I’m also well aware of the fact that people who are just at the gym to work out also look around at their fellow gym-goers, even if it’s just to say hello or ask if someone is done with a certain piece of equipment. When you go to the same gym all the time, you inevitably run into people you know. You get workout ideas from people around you. (I’m convinced that the reason there are so many mirrors in the gym is so you can look at people with a smaller chance of them realizing they’re being looked at.) So, because I am conscious of the fact that people will see me, and because I am not a caveman, I put a little effort into my gym attire. Today’s internal wardrobe debate came about because I happened across this shirt, and I stopped to contemplate whether I should wear it to the gym on base. Continue reading “Wearing my Pride”
I’ve been posting on Facebook and Twitter lately about how many days it’s been since my husband, Ben, had to leave Japan despite having moved here with me in August when I was stationed here with the US Marine Corps. He entered Japan on August 2, 2013 on a tourist visa (90-day passport stamp), fully expecting to be allowed to stay indefinitely once he became a dependent under the Status of Forces Agreement (wiki link, full text) between the US and Japan. On October 26, 2013, he left Japan so he would not be here beyond the expiration of his passport stamp. I miss him so much, and although we are confident things will work out, they haven’t yet. Here’s some background info to bring you up to speed.
Today, on National Coming Out day, I thought I would share my thoughts and a bit of my own story. I came out to my friends and family in the summer of 1995, over 18 years ago, just after graduating from high school in Naperville, Illinois. It feels like such a long time ago, but it is a time I still carry with me, always fresh in my mind.
If you haven’t found it already, be sure to check out our wedding blog at benandmatthew.com. You can watch the ceremony online at Livestream. Please also consider donating to our Okinawa Fund to help us move to Okinawa together as the military still doesn’t recognize Ben and my husband and dependent.
[Update: a version of this letter was published in the Marine Corps Times, 15 April 2013.]
Serving my country as a United States Marine has been and continues to be the greatest privilege and honor of my life. In just a few short months my commitment to defending our nation will take me to my next duty station in Okinawa, Japan. I have a lot to do between now and then, not the least of which is graduating from Expeditionary Warfare School at Marine Corps University, but no doubt my personal priority is getting married to the love of my life, Ben. Continue reading “Why DOMA needs to go… Now.”
Anyone who knows me also knows that I’m self-confident. I’m intelligent, I’m honest (sometimes brutally), and I will sacrifice anything–short of my integrity–for people and causes who need my help. I am willing to learn, I challenge people, and I expect people to challenge me in return, because I know the result will be better and clearer understanding. These things make me who I am, and they make me a good Marine. In fact, they make me good at just about everything I do, and they are the same things that drive me to work harder, do more, and push those around me to do the same. Even equipped with this knowledge of myself, I struggle to maintain the level of strength it takes to meet the challenges I face on a daily basis as an openly gay Marine.