Wearing my Pride

It’s not that I dress up to go to the gym–I’m really only there to work out. But I’m also well aware of the fact that people who are just at the gym to work out also look around at their fellow gym-goers, even if it’s just to say hello or ask if someone is done with a certain piece of equipment. When you go to the same gym all the time, you inevitably run into people you know. You get workout ideas from people around you. (I’m convinced that the reason there are so many mirrors in the gym is so you can look at people with a smaller chance of them realizing they’re being looked at.) So, because I am conscious of the fact that people will see me, and because I am not a caveman, I put a little effort into my gym attire. Today’s internal wardrobe debate came about because I happened across this shirt, and I stopped to contemplate whether I should wear it to the gym on base.Image Continue reading “Wearing my Pride”

Why I’m Alone in Japan, Part 2

Our first USMC Birthday Ball together, 2012.
Our first USMC Birthday Ball together, 2012.

My previous post included all the information I had to date on how I ended up on a permanent assignment without my husband Ben. I know that it is being used as a reference for people who want to help us, including people at the Pentagon who are working on this issue. A week later, I have no news except that the issue is still being worked on. As of this morning, it’s been 16 days since Ben had to leave Okinawa. His 90-day passport stamp was due to expire and he needed to leave to avoid violating Japanese immigration laws.

Continue reading “Why I’m Alone in Japan, Part 2”

I’m Getting Married in the Morning (actually the afternoon)

If you haven’t found it already, be sure to check out our wedding blog at benandmatthew.com. You can watch the ceremony online at Livestream. Please also consider donating to our Okinawa Fund to help us move to Okinawa together as the military still doesn’t recognize Ben and my husband and dependent.

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Proposing to Ben at the White House

IMG_3349(Photo by Jennifer Cintron)

IMG_6629(Photo by Mikey Tapscott)

Such a wonderful night for us, and it’s received so much attention on Facebook (here and here), Redditimgur, BuzzFeed, Gawker, and Towleroad!  Really, the only thing on my mind was making it a memorable and unforgettable night for Ben. Thank you all for the well wishes!!

On memories of childhood

I’ll be honest, I really don’t remember many specifics from my life as a kid. I have vague memories of the houses I grew up in, names of some of the friends I played with, vacations we went on as a family, etc. The more distinct memories I have of my life, even through recent years, are the ones that have some sensory association, like the smell of popcorn we used to pop before my mother’s concerts in the park as a flutist with the Naperville Municipal Band, or emotional association, like how excited I was when I found out we were going on a “Big Red Boat” (Premiere Cruise Line) cruise to the Bahamas and Disney World. It seems, though, that emotion extreme enough to trigger these memories didn’t come very often, and there are vast stretches of my life I just don’t have access to anymore.

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On sexuality, ignorance, and sex in the showers

Whenever opponents of open gay service in the military are asked why they favor “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT) (or an outright ban on gays serving in the military), they respond that sexuality has no place in the military, and they couldn’t be more wrong. As long as there are humans serving in the military, sexuality will have a place there as well. Even a cursory glance at Maslow’s hierarchy of needs shows that sexuality plays a role in the human condition. It plays a role in every level of this pyramid, yet opponents of gay service ignore the role sexuality plays in all of our lives, starting with their own.

Continue reading “On sexuality, ignorance, and sex in the showers”